Those who suffer the pain of trauma have a hard task at hand, too. They must be willing to feel their own pain and share it with others. Although whatever traumatized them is not their fault, it is their responsibility to get whatever help they need to heal. They must take the time to allow their pain to come forth, to hold it, to acknowledge it. They must be willing to accept the help and support of others, and to reject seemingly easy fixes: addiction, denial, blaming. All of these responses to trauma end up perpetuating it. This is not a brief process or an easy one. But it is the foundation for the healing of trauma at both the individual and community levels.
Hicks-Ray, Denyse. The Pain Didn’t Start Here: Trauma and Violence in the African American Community